UPDATED: Al Gore to His Masseuse: “Um, I’m Feeling a Little Warming, Right About HERE…”
A long time ago my old man, whose one of the sharpest men you could ever meet, said to me, “You know what? If you become a success in your life and the money goes to your head, you’re finished–better not to make it. Doesn’t matter who you are or where your from. And you ask me sometimes why I act like I never left my village: better to be called a villager than to be called an idiot.”
And so it goes with one Albert Gore, former Vice-President of the United States of America, and the Secretary-General of world climate change fraud.
Gore’s theft of people’s money through various phony global warming vehicles has obviously gone to his head–and not to be crass, the one without the brain (well, assuming the larger of the two has one).
The story out of Oregon tonight is instructive for all of us, but none more so than those craving the almighty dollar. Apparently, in October of 2006, at the zenith of his ability to lie about the planet, the Goracle was feeling a little heat and needed the ole pressure release valve extended. He was in Portland attending a conference where he was to speak about global warming (fraud) and asked for a masseuse to be sent to his room.
And then the trouble started…
In a transcript of the interview released by the police, the massage therapist said she was doing requested abdominal work on Gore when he started to moan and demanded she go lower.
“I did not immediately call the police as I feared being made into a public spectacle and my reputation being destroyed,” she said. “I was not sure what to tell them and was concerned my story would not be believed since there was no DNA evidence from a completed act of rape. I did not even know what to call what had happened to me.”
“I was shocked and I did not massage beyond what is considered a safe, nonsexual area of the abdomen,” she said. “He further insisted and acted angry, becoming verbally sharp and loud.
“I went into much deeper shock as I realized it appeared he was demanding sexual favors or sexual behaviors.”
She said Gore grabbed her hand and shoved it toward his pubic area. She alleged he later tried to have sex with her and began caressing her before she squirmed out of his grasp.
This is an excerpt from a Fox News story that ran tonight. You can read it, here.
He was getting “abdominal work” done. He grabbed her AFTER having failed to get her to seize the Tennessee pretzel AND tried to have sex with her! She had to “squirm out of his grasp.”
I can’t take it. Mr. Perfect committing an “incomplete rape” (read the victim’s statement). The same guy who was privately “appalled” by the adventures of ‘Slick Willy’s willy. And remember how he and Tipper (there’s his first problem) were telling you and me that listening to Ozzy and Axel would lead to a life of immorality?!?
(Queue maniacal laughter again…)
I swear, if any of you tell me, ever again, that there is no God…
UPDATE:
Only because I have not been able to stop laughing since I read this last night, not at Gore’s grief, but at the fact he is such an incredible lying hypocrite. A’Southern Gentleman’ was how the clown Larry King once introduced him. What a lark!
Here is more narrative from the detailed report:
She tried to use an acupressure technique to relax Gore and thought she may have nearly put him to sleep. She went into the bathroom to wash up and came out to pack up.
That’s when, she says, Gore wrapped her in an “inescapable embrace” and fondled her back, buttocks and breasts as she was trying to break down her massage table.
She called him a “crazed sex poodle” and tried to distract him, pointing out a box of Moonstruck chocolates on a nearby table. He went for the chocolates and then offered her some, cornering her, fondling her and shoving his tongue in her mouth to french kiss as he pressed against her.
And here, is the link to the police report and another more detailed account from Oregon.
I tell you, this is just too good–the exemplar of virtue; the man who will save the planet turns out to be nothing more than a 315lb. frat boy on chocolates instead of coke. You just can’t write this sort of stuff folks.
Yes, yes Alex, but you must remember that he invented the internet and that he was Segal’s inspiration for “Love Story.” Can you imagine the pressure on the poor guy? It must be terribly stressful. How can we begrudge him a happy ending. And, after all, he is related to Gore Vidal, don’t you know?
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Very good!
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So, this has been floating around since 2007 and no one gave two hoots. What does this tell one? In the US of A, politicos can do no wrong. A double standard country if there ever was one. As for Gore, the man has never been able to finish what he started. Once again the beauty of the web is proven.
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The problem as I see it, is there is no incontrovertible physical evidence. That makes this whole thing suspect. The reality is, we do not and can not know what really transpired. All we have are accusations and denials, and if we remain dispassionate, we have to give equal weight to both. I am not here to defend Mr. Gore, but seems unlikely that whichever court has jurisdiction would be able to ever bring him up on charges. It is not like there isn’t precedent with accusers being less than truthful about events regarding the rich, famous and powerful, and yes I do believe this woman may ultimately have something to gain from going public. This smells, but it is difficult to determine which way the wind is blowing. I’m just waiting for Whoopi Goldberg to say it wasn’t “rape-rape”.
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I’m not so much concerned about the details as I am that this man has perpetrated the single greatest fraud in modern times and has held himself up as some paragon of virtue. And he clearly isn’t. Let me tell you, I’ve been a cheater in the past, and it’s a very lonely, self-destructive life. But I never BSed anyone about it. I’m happy to show you my scars rather than polish up my medals because I’m as common as the next guy. Kings put their pants on one leg at a time, just like you and me. But Gore played this pious, mightier than thou role, that is clearly evaporating rather quickly. Do I believe everything the masseuse claims–of course not. A woman who is feeling that she is part of an “incomplete” rape, gets the hell out of that situation ASAP. She went back into the bedroom, etc. But that this is the third time Gore is accused, except this time with lush details…well, you have to wonder. Unless he completely manhandled her and she’s petrified because of the intimidation factor. Who knows? But that Gore isn’t denying anything and that his wife has left him because he was considerably less than the pious demi-god he played–well, that’s significant to me.
I call a spade a spade. If I was caught doing something nasty tomorrow, well, my bad I suppose–but I’ve always respected women, no matter how a relationship went.
The accusations of attempted rape against Gore are something from outside my world–you don’t act like that where I’m from. With me, what you see is what you get. You cheat on your spouse, sure, that’s not good, but to be slobbering all over a gal and trying to forcibly stick your tongue down her throat is just repulsive. Men like that are not real men.
Never pretend to be something you’re not. People like you better and you don’t have to live the lie. Too late for Al Bore.
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Ahhhhhhhl Whore?
Somewhere, Arnold Ziffle weeps…
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Hi Alex, Who would think Gore had it in him, must be all CO2 caused, warm, activating his loins & brain.
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I know, it’s just so telling that all these guys that make themselves out to be such exemplars of virtue are nothing more than con-artists.
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Alex you have been consistently denying Al Gore’r reports of climate change and yet it would appear there is clear evidence that, at least on this occasion, his barometer did rise.
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Apparently, the ‘Wooden Adonis’ over-shot his bolt. Sorry, even I couldn’t resist…
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